Cancer

hi,
It's me, Jason. I am sorry that I don't have any cute pictures or anything that remotely defines who we are or anything like that tonight, but this:
Cancer.
Strange name isn't it, like something taboo or estranged from you, yet so much a part of your life. At least that is how it feels for me....
I have known quite a few people in my life that have had "cancer". I too might be the culprit of such a disease on day. There is one I remember in particular, Joy's aunt (I feel like I cursed by typing her name, from now on, I will call her Jehoviah because Jehoviah makes me think of the plastic people knocking on the door with books and things). Ah yes, Jehoviah's aunt... Well she was a smoker, but from what I remember the cancer wasn't caused by smoking, it was caused by something else. She had a granddaughter, just a few months old. She had two kids, one like 19 or 20 with a daughter (duh!) and one that was like, I don't know, 13 or 14. Anyway, she was very cool. Pretty laid back and liberal. Well she got the cancer and died. Most people looked at her like it was a horrible death and a tragedy to die so young. Well it was, I agree. But, she had plenty of time to say her goodbye's and make her peace in the world before she went. Still wasn't a good deal though. She was a nice lady.
My friends mom had cancer, also a bad deal. She seems well now, but my friend, well he is what one might call a "momma's boy" so I felt real bad for him, real bad.
But cancer......I think it sounds taboo because it is called cancer, it makes me think of horoscopes and things of that nature. Usually, when I see someone with Cancer, they talk of God. I remember my Grandad talking about God and he isn't religious in the least. I think it sort of becomes a contradiction with normalcy because it has such a supernatural sort of name.
Cancer, makes me think of horoscopes and stars and what kind day lays ahead. Five star? Not usually.
So anyway, to get to the point at hand, I got this friend, a real kind of friend. Not the type of friend you talk to everyday about personal stuff, but the type of friend that demands your respect. How does a person demand respect? I don't know, you just see it, you see it in her children, you see it in her eyes, and you see it by the things you know of her in the present, and the things you have learned about her in the past.
I respect her.
Hard working.
Caring
Giving.
One of the greatest mom's in the entire world. I know this because I know she believes in forgiveness..and unconditional love, which is a rare quality in today's society.
She believes in God... I know, how can I count this as a trait deserving respect if I don't so much believe in the same God myself...you know Jesus and all of that kind of stuff...
Well she does... but in a real way... a forgiving and humble way. The way you can't buy. the way you just know is true. I have seen it in people in life, Namely my Granny. Well she's got it, and I admire it.
It's breast cancer. The fact that it is breast cancer humbles me even more. It isn't that I see her in that kind of way, the way guys look at girls. I see her in the way of a true woman... I mean that. The way of a woman that is kind, but hard. The way of a woman that makes you realize that you and your penis and you just don't have it all figured out.
She makes me think of motherly instinct and unconditional love. The type of girl that would be there when your life as you know it falls apart (which mine kind of did how in respect to how I know it to be, it's ok, I am much better now). This person, well she is real....How often is it that you can say that you see people who are real? For me, few and far between.
She will be gone for awhile...and I don't like it.
I like it for the fact that she will get better, but I don't like it for the fact that, although I don't speak to her all the time, I know that she is there. And now, in the pyhsical way, she isn't.
Everybody needs people who are just "there".
I wish her the best of luck and I want her to know that I am by her side.
Today, and where tomorrow may take us.
I want her to know that I am "there". Maybe not exactly where she is, but somewhere in between. Why?
I believe that it is that one's who are like her that are the ones who will make wrong world go right. No Republicans, Democrats, christian, or Jews.
Just a mom, a wish, a dream.
and you.